I don't deal with stress particularly well. Mind you I don't freak out or lose it but I tend to cope with it in self destructive ways. For example drinking a jumbo of vodka on a Tuesday night or smoking a whole pack of cigarettes in an hour. Just like this can be a downward spiral drink too much spend to much money get depressed drink more I am hoping that the positive steps I have been taking will start it all spinning the other way.
Positive things that help me relieve stress
- Walking the dog
- Reading a book
- Watching the Twins
- Giving\Getting Backrubs
- Cleaning
- Hugs
- Working out
- Taking care of business
I need to curtail the current level of drinking and quit smoking it is a no brainier, but why is it so hard? Why am I scared to let go of a blanket that smothering me to death?
I have so much to look forward to in life why do I have such a hard time embracing it and instead worry constantly that it is all going to be taken away?
I think I am going to take the month of July and just work on spinning momentum the other direction.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
Weekend ReCap
Friday
Mowed
Trimmed Bushes
Cleaned
Taco's
Saturday
Flippy Cup 2009 Tourney @ My House
Dirty Balls
More Brats then I care to Remember
That was fun:) Thanks everybody for coming:)
Sunday
One of the best Sunday fundays I have had in a long time:)
Mowed
Trimmed Bushes
Cleaned
Taco's
Saturday
Flippy Cup 2009 Tourney @ My House
Dirty Balls
More Brats then I care to Remember
That was fun:) Thanks everybody for coming:)
Sunday
One of the best Sunday fundays I have had in a long time:)
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Things I have learned this week.
- Beer is not that bad
- You can't lose what you don't have on the table
- Invest in little things that make money and eventually you will be able to invest in big things that make more money.
- Life revolves around retroprcoity.
- I haven't been very good at retroprocity latley.
- Saying your not and asshole, bitch or mean is just a passive aggressive way to be an asshole, bitch and mean and con your self into feeling ok about it.
- Even with a few set backs here and there my life is moving in the right direction and there is peace in that.
- I have some support from some truly amazing people.
- There is something truly rewarding in a long walk.
- Facebook is life support for a lot of relationships that should have died a long time ago. - Thanks Far ;)
- If you cut too many corners you end up with a circle - Thanks Sornie;)
- When doing business with a religious son of a bitch get it in writing, Their word isn't worth shit not with the good lord telling how to fuck you on the deal. - Thanks William;)
- Thank you cards can go a long way.
- I know whose hand I want to hold for the rest of my life.
- Not fighting nice can lead to short term gain but long term harm
- You can't lose what you don't have on the table
- Invest in little things that make money and eventually you will be able to invest in big things that make more money.
- Life revolves around retroprcoity.
- I haven't been very good at retroprocity latley.
- Saying your not and asshole, bitch or mean is just a passive aggressive way to be an asshole, bitch and mean and con your self into feeling ok about it.
- Even with a few set backs here and there my life is moving in the right direction and there is peace in that.
- I have some support from some truly amazing people.
- There is something truly rewarding in a long walk.
- Facebook is life support for a lot of relationships that should have died a long time ago. - Thanks Far ;)
- If you cut too many corners you end up with a circle - Thanks Sornie;)
- When doing business with a religious son of a bitch get it in writing, Their word isn't worth shit not with the good lord telling how to fuck you on the deal. - Thanks William;)
- Thank you cards can go a long way.
- I know whose hand I want to hold for the rest of my life.
- Not fighting nice can lead to short term gain but long term harm
Friday, June 26, 2009
In the Flesh
And your very flesh shall be a great poem.
Walt Whitman
I thought about this while looking in the mirror this morning at my prematurely grey hair, receding hair line expanding and contracting mid section.
The hardened scars on my knuckles and hands.
My sturdy legs that hold me upright regardless of what is being consumed or raining down on me.
A bumblebee tattoo running down the length of my forearm.
Knees shot with ACL injuries.
Calloused feet.
Dark bloodhot eyes yearing for another hour of sleep.
Teeth darkened with coffee and cigarette stains.
Eyes that still sparkle with curiosity.
Imagination that refuses to tire.
I am not sure it is a great poem but it is my poem and despite the wear it makes me smile.
Walt Whitman
I thought about this while looking in the mirror this morning at my prematurely grey hair, receding hair line expanding and contracting mid section.
The hardened scars on my knuckles and hands.
My sturdy legs that hold me upright regardless of what is being consumed or raining down on me.
A bumblebee tattoo running down the length of my forearm.
Knees shot with ACL injuries.
Calloused feet.
Dark bloodhot eyes yearing for another hour of sleep.
Teeth darkened with coffee and cigarette stains.
Eyes that still sparkle with curiosity.
Imagination that refuses to tire.
I am not sure it is a great poem but it is my poem and despite the wear it makes me smile.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
-- Dylan Thomas
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
-- Dylan Thomas
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Mafia Wars
Ok while I first thought this was the dumbest thing ever created I am now offically hooked.
The only thing I don't really get is what to do with the loot? what is the purpose?
Anyone want to join my mafia hit me up on facebook you heard me.
The only thing I don't really get is what to do with the loot? what is the purpose?
Anyone want to join my mafia hit me up on facebook you heard me.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Dark Colors Attract Heat
I had a door to door salesman come by yesterday asking if I would like to reduce my heating costs by purchasing darker color shingles, since darker colors attract and retain more heat.
As I slammed my door shut I thought about that for a second....by that logic shouldn't evolution have evolved lighter skinned people around the equator and darker skinned people around the poles?
As I slammed my door shut I thought about that for a second....by that logic shouldn't evolution have evolved lighter skinned people around the equator and darker skinned people around the poles?
Monday, June 22, 2009
Weekend ReCap
Friday
Mowed
Watered Plants
Contemplated Life
Did a massive amount of laundry
Watched the Twins Game
Bed
Saturday
Worked for a bit in the morning
Read outside all day :Physics of the Impossible by Michio Kaku I love books like this that just fire my imagination.
Dog Park
Watched the Twins Game
Sunday
Worked for a bit in the morning
Walked around the lake.
Watched the Twins Game
Went to obedience school.
Mowed
Watered Plants
Contemplated Life
Did a massive amount of laundry
Watched the Twins Game
Bed
Saturday
Worked for a bit in the morning
Read outside all day :Physics of the Impossible by Michio Kaku I love books like this that just fire my imagination.
Dog Park
Watched the Twins Game
Sunday
Worked for a bit in the morning
Walked around the lake.
Watched the Twins Game
Went to obedience school.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Freedom
They say that with great freedom comes great responsibility well I got a shit ton of responsibility now I am just wondering where the freedom is...
BNN Report
-In a balmy game @ Basset Creek Park the "Red Balls Are Better then Blue Balls" beat the "Just for Kix" 4-2 last night. Bringing our summer season record to 2-0...go team
- I am seriously thinking of turning on the air conditionare tonight.
That is all
BNN Report
-In a balmy game @ Basset Creek Park the "Red Balls Are Better then Blue Balls" beat the "Just for Kix" 4-2 last night. Bringing our summer season record to 2-0...go team
- I am seriously thinking of turning on the air conditionare tonight.
That is all
Thursday, June 18, 2009
All In
I am all in. I don't really have a choice. Wish I was sitting with a better hand then a deuce, eight off suited but I guess that is life. Now I am just waiting for the flop and if you are a player of the odds like I am you know that is going to take a small miracle.
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