Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Prediction #8751

The next billion dollar rapper will not need to speak any words. They will merely grunt and shout almost unintelligible vulgar sounds over remixed beats. They will have diamonds surgically implanted into there knuckles and will have a solid gold leg that is the result of being shot 26+ times in a drive-by.

I also predict that they will hail from somewhere in the deep south where archaeologist will discover a super ghetto that has long since been forgotten about.

I further more am coining the following phases in anticipation of this find and the diamond knuckle inserts...

"Pling" = Punch with Bling
"Knuckle Rocks"
"Fing" Fist Bling
and
"Kling" Knuckle Bling

I am also going to use, "Give you a shiner". or "you want a shiner?" in this new context right here on this blog for the first time ever...you are witnessing history in the making...

Peeice oouta shawty

This has been a Bizzio Von Bittensnach production all rights reserved

6 comments:

Mags said...

Wut up homz?

This post is hysterical. I personally like Knuckle Rocks...and I wouldn't mind a few diamonds on these fingers.

~paige~ said...

I think the diamond encrustted knuckles will actually be called "finga ice"

Thomas said...

All you playas out dere better check yoself before you wreck yoself. Thanks for keepin it real, "Big" Johnson.

Simply Jolene said...

This is so funny. I needed this laugh today..but the sad truth is...your right

the108 said...

It's very sad but very true. Deez bitches just don't got da flo no mo'.

Little Sis said...

Wuz up? You wuz in Chucktown duh odduh day huh? (Chucktown-what the new rappers you're referring to call Charleston, SC). Scary, but your "kling" and stuff will probably originate here...and no, I am NOT proud of that.. ;)

Thanks for the giggle, it was much needed! 3 weeks until I'm back in MN! Yay!